The Last Hunt - Part 3
He heard Jacob laugh.
“So you’ve always been stubborn??
Josh chuckled.
“Damn right, I have. Sometimes it’s a good thing, other times it ain’t. That one it was, cause I wanted to prove myself to my dad. Prove to him that he hadn’t made a mistake and that I was big enough to go hunting with him on a regular basis.? He looked over at Jacob. “You ain’t got much room to talk, though. You’re every bit as stubborn as me.?
“You got me there, Grandpa, I must have got it from you.?
“I doubt that, cause I still have all of mine.? He chuckled again and looked down toward the bottom and where the hounds were. “Come on, let’s start heading to the dogs. There’ll be at the river soon and I’d rather them not have the chance to head to far on the other side if they follow that coon across it.?
The two of them stood up and headed to where the ground spilled over the side of the hill. Josh reached it and walked along the ridge, Jacob following close behind him. A hollow cut up the hill not too far down from where they had been sitting, and it would be a lot easier to get down there than it would be to go straight down the side like he had when he was a lot younger.
“So, how have you been doing in school?? Josh looked over his shoulder at Jacob.
“Not too bad I guess. My grades aren’t too bad. It’ll be Christmas break before too long and I’ll be getting my report card. I guess I’ll know better then.?
They walked along in silence for the rest of the way to the trail down the hollow. The long bawls of the hounds switched and they weren’t moving any more. Josh smiled.
“Sounds like they’re treed. And on this side of the river to boot. Must be a young coon that ain’t figured out all the tricks to fool the dogs and get away yet.?
“Looks like the dogs got lucky,? Jacob said. “Or at least we did, we don’t have to cross the river to get them.?
“We wouldn’t be crossing the river. Either they would come back when I called them, or you’d had been getting wet tonight.? They had reached the bottom of the hollow and now walked side by side through the clearing between the edge of the hill and the creek. “So I’d say that you were the lucky one, since they seldom come off of a tree once they get a coon.?
The Last Hunt - Part 1
The Last Hunt - Part 2
hunting, hunting sense, coon hunting, short stories, fiction, creative writing, writing
November 28th, 2007 at 3:59 pm
quit goofing, we all think you are an excellent writer and want you to continue.
now, please send me a picture for my Christmas Card project.
Your story is pretty damn good too.
November 28th, 2007 at 4:18 pm
Heh, thanks. That was a serious session of whining, wasn’t it? I’ll have to get an approriate picture, I’ll try to do it by the end of the week.
November 28th, 2007 at 4:19 pm
Oh yes, and thank you.
November 28th, 2007 at 5:04 pm
Its about time you got back.
What have I always told you,never give up,
never quit.
You are a good writer,but it is nice to hear.
Why do you think I am so proud of you?
Keep up the good work.We missed you.
November 30th, 2007 at 10:19 am
Hi, I heard from another blog something about you wanting to throw in the towel on blogging… just got here, but already what I’ve read is awesome. Really hope you don’t give up. I subscribed via email (I love that option, thanks) and looking forward to more. I figure, if nothing else, we bloggers need to support each other– if the only people who read the blogs are other bloggers, who cares, at least you’re connecting with someone right?
Anyway, for what it’s worth, hang in there, don’t give up… what you write does matter to others who read it. -Michael
November 30th, 2007 at 5:58 pm
I’ll offer up a critique! I was a Lit. major in college so I get the whole idea of an honest critique.
Your dialog is VERY good - love it. I really got a mental picture of the characters from it.
Descriptions of the action - good. E.g. “They walked along in silence for the rest of the way to the trail down the hollow. The long bawls of the hounds switched and they weren’t moving any more. Josh smiled.” I got the idea without noticing it was there - which to me is the way to go. If it’s not good, I would be thinking “Oh, he’s describing the action.” instead of flowing along with the story.
Descriptions of the surroundings in general - be careful that they aren’t too…much?.. wordy? Not sure how to explain it. For an example, the very first paragraph. Three of the four sentences are very long with many many “descriptors” as I call them. There’s probably a way to say it vividly, shorter. Same or more impact with less words.
Can’t wait to see the rest of the story!! And thank you for reminding me to get off my duff and work on the novel that’s in my head!