Hunting Jokes
Here are a few hunting jokes I’ve ran across I thought may make a few of you chuckle.
Definition of Vegetarian:
Old Indian word for bad hunter.
~~~
A guy goes hunting and gets lost in the woods. Remembering the universal distress signal of 3 shots, he fires 3 shots into the air and waits. After an hour he fires 3 more shots. Another hour goes by and still no one comes to help. Preparing for the next sequence he says to himself, “I hope somebody comes this time because these are my last three arrows.”
~~~
The Wednesday-night church service coincided with the last day of hunting season. Or pastor asked who had bagged a deer. No one raised a hand. Puzzled, the pastor said, “I don’t get it. Last Sunday many of you said you were missing because of hunting season. I had the whole congregation pray for your deer.”
One hunter groaned, “Well, it worked. They’re all safe.”
~~~
Two guys go hunting. Jerry has never gone hunting while Joe has hunted all his life. When they get to the northern Wisconsin woods, Joe tells Jerry to sit by a tree and not make a sound while Joe checks out a deer stand.
When he gets about a quarter of a mile away, Joe hears a blood-curdling scream. He rushes back to Jerry and yells, “I thought I told you to be quiet!”
Jerry says, “Hey, I tried. I really tried!! When those snakes crawled over me, I didn’t make a sound. When that bear was breathing down my neck, I didn’t make a peep. But when those two chipmunks crawled up my pants leg and said - ‘Should we take them with us or eat them here?’, I couldn’t keep quiet any more!”
Leave a Reply